I had high hopes for this Shaolin Soccer in Japan, and with cute Japanese girls in the lead. It has the Producer and director of Bayside Shakedown, Kameyama Chihiro and Motohiro Katsuyuki, appearances by two Shaolin Soccer cast, Tin Kai Man And Lam Chi Chung and is executive produced by Stephen Chow, but this film did not come through at all. In fact the film is really a total mess, without the fun of Shaolin Soccer, and even the cute girls can’t help pull this ridiculous mishmash of a story out of the toilet. The end is like a cheesy version of Game of Death, but with a non-martial artist in Bruce’s part (Jeeja Yani from Chocolate has really ruined for me seeing cute girls do martial arts because she is so talented) but with cheesy effects, and some elements from Star Wars (the Dark Side and the light Side), though it all seems to be saved by love. I was really hoping for a Shaolin Soccer with girls about Lacrosse, but they really only touch on that, and then veer into other territory with a weird story of the University President who is running some evil training school on the school grounds, and wants to fight Rin for no reason whatsoever, and it never really makes sense, nor is it brought together with the rest of the story, it is like a second story grafted onto the first that has some of the same characters, but doesn’t really fit together, and then for the credits they actually do the Shaolin style Lacrosse games, and that made me actually wish that was what the movie was about, instead of, uh, I am not sure exactly. Kitty Zhang Yuqi who plays the student who befriends Rin and gets her into Lacrosse, is super cute though, really reminds me of a young Cecelia Cheung, before the whole sex scandal thing at least! She will go places I am sure.I can’t recomend this one, even the cheap Chinese Region 3 DVD which I picked up doesn’t really make this worth it.

Rin (Shibasaki Kou) has just completed her 3000 days of training at Shaolin in China, and she is to return to China, though her teachers worry that she could turn to the dark side. She returns to China, and with her enthusiasm tries to recruit every person she can find to do Shaolin Kung Fu, but no one is interested. She returns home to her dojo and finds it closed and completely run down, and goes to seek out the old students to find out what happened to the dojo, and no one seems to know exactly. At a restaurant she finds Fatty (Lam Chi Chung) and Tin (Tin Kai Man) and she finds her former Sifu Iwai (Eguchi Yosuke) is the chef, and a Chinese student named Minmin (Kitty Zhang Yuqi) works there. Minmin is the only one interested in Shaolin Martial arts and makes a deal with Rin to teach her martial arts if she goes to join the lacrosse team. There is a cross story going of the evil university president (Nakamura Toru) who is using the university to make money and train students in a special facility, but it doesn’t really intercross. Minmin introduces Rin to the other girls, and she shows her strength, though it doesn’t make her accurate with a lacrosse ball, and she gets permission to join the team.

REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS….

Iwai seems to want to keep Rin from playing though, and he becomes the girls lacrosse team coach, and starts teaching the spirit of Shaolin Martial arts, but not the actual martial arts, and doesn’t let Rin participate. Then at their first practice game, he won’t let Rin play, and they tie before the first quarter, but someone is injured, so the girls let Rin in, and she keeps hogging the ball and not passing, and every shot of hers misses in some way, so she loses the game for them, and they kick her off the team.

Rin starts to learn about team work playing with some of the people from the Dojo and their kids soccer team, and she learns to pass and be good, and the girls watch, and slowly they start doing martial arts with her and Minmin, and fixing up the dojo, and eventually they get Iwai to let her back on the team, and once Rin is a team player, they can’t help but win.

Iwai then makes Rin promise not to fight, that he will protect her, and instantly she is attacked by the Presidents dark armored warriors, but she runs, and Iwai goes and confronts the President, but won’t fight him. The President wants to fight Rin because she has so much Martial Arts potential, and he wants to see who is the best, and will do anything.

Rin finds Iwai, and the fighters light the dojo on fire, and they take Minmin and blow up the restaurant.

Rin goes to fight the President against Iwai’s wishes. She goes and must fight the whole school it seems, but Fatty and Tin show up to help, and she goes through a series of CG rooms and some fights to finally get to the President and Minmin.

Rin and the President have a huge CG fight, mostly on CG water that works really bad, and it is a toss up if he wants her to become evil, or just fight her, but eventually her good energy comes out and she hugs him and makes him remember the good things in life, like when he used to train with her at the Dojo, and it seems he is good now, and Minmin is OK.

Under the credits we see the girls lacrosse team, dressed in Shaolin outfits winning match after match, now all with Shaolin skills, and going to the world championship, this all being the fun that the film should have been, but wasn’t.

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Really a waste. So much potential, but the film really does not hold together at all. Really overall a waste of time.